What IF…..

Two roads diverged in a wood and I – I took the one less traveled by, and that has made all the difference. ~ Robert Frost

What if I were not where I am today? I would not be a mother or a nana. Twenty-seven years ago I would have never imagined having three beautiful children, a handsome son-in-law, and an absolutely gorgeous grand-daughter.

Left to right: (Cody, Kami, & Topher) (Kami & Brad) (Kyleigh) (Brad & Kyleigh)

If I sound bias, it’s probably because I am when it comes to my family. On my 7th birthday I remember having a huge party and everyone from my 1st grade class was there. There was this boy, by the name of Jimmy, who bought me a board game called “The Bride Game”. I was so embarrassed because the other kids joked about how he liked me and wanted to marry me, that’s why he gave me the game. It actually ended up being a pretty cool game and my friends and I played it quite often. Afterall, what little girl didn’t fantasize about her future wedding!

The object of the game is to be the first girl to reach the Wedding Ceremony. As you move around the board you collect three members of the wedding party (bride, groom, & attendee), something old, something new, something borrowed, and something blue, a wedding cake, a bouquet, and a wedding ring. Once you have all of these items you move on to the wedding march.  First one to the Ceremony wins. As I recall, the grooms where pretty hot. That’s when I decided I was going to marry a blonde hair, blue-eyed boy from California. Heck, I didn’t even really know where California was at that point in my life but I did know who I was going to marry.

In May 1985 I met this handsome Marine; blonde hair, blue eyes, and was stationed in California. In November of that very same year we were married, I was 18 and he was 19. We travelled to so many places and lived life together for the next 25 years. In December 2010 our marriage ended. All in all, I say it was a good run! (Trust me, it wasn’t easy for me to get to the point where I can say this without crying, but I’m here now!)

I have ALWAYS believed that things happen for a reason….. I am very thankful for the game Jimmy bought me and for being a little girl who was able to dream about her future wedding. I believe in fate, after all, I did marry my blonde hair, blue-eyed boy from California. I thank God everyday for blessing me with my children. My pregnancy with Kami was tough, she was born breech and 3 weeks early. I was told not to have anymore children. My pregnancy with Topher was just as tough, he was born a month early. I was told, “DO NOT HAVE ANYMORE CHILDREN”! In 1995, I decided to have one more baby. My pregnancy with Cody was the toughest. I was constantly on bed rest and always going into pre-term labor. He was born 2 months early and I did not know until the day I delivered, BUT he was supposed to be a twin. Apparently I lost one in my first trimester. I would do it all over again in a heart beat! They are all worth it!

I love that I had the opportunity to live in many places and experience thousands of moments. I’m grateful for the hundreds of friends I’ve made along the way. I’m even glad that I have another chance at loving someone else and making new memories with the next part of my life. I’m thankful for it all…. the great times and the bad, they are what made me who I am today.

What if Jimmy had never bought me the game or what if I never fantasized about a boy with blonde hair, blue eyes, and lived in California?

The very first decision we make for our children could possibly scar them for life.

Kami asked me this question and it got me thinking.

Kami: Was just thinking and randomly wondering why your kids names start with the k/c sound but all our names don’t start with a k or a c!?!?!?

Me: Well…. I didn’t want to use a “C” with you because then it would have been Cami… Like the camis soldiers wore. I didn’t want “K” for Topher because he was named after saint Christopher and I didn’t want to disrespect his name. I didn’t want “K” for Cody because to me it looked too much like koala. Ok… Your name, Kami Janell….Christopher Mark… When I was pregnant with Cody if it was a boy I decided I would take the “C” from Topher’s first name and “J” from your middle name, Cody James. If he was a girl I was going to use the “K” from your first name and “M” from Topher’s middle name. Make sense?

Naming your child is usually the very first decision we, as parents, make for our children. I guess in essence, we are the ones who determines how they will be perceived of in the world (Just one of my thoughts). We’ve heard of all these celebrities naming their child bizarre names like; Apple, Pilot, Camera, Puma, Sailor, Banjo, etc… Some are cute but come on people would you really want to grow up being called Camera or Banjo?

What about the poor girl from New Zealand that was names Talula Does The Hula From Hawaii… What the heck were her parents thinking of! At the age of 9 her parents split up and the Judge who was making the ruling as to where she would live became concerned over the name. The girl was then made a ward of the court until her name was changed. (Read Article)

I was lucky when my parents named me. I was named Annette, after Annette Funicello and Liza, after Liza Manelli. For some reason though I really didn’t like my first name, Annette, so I have used my middle name, Liza, since 4th grade.

My logic behind naming my children:

Kami Janell – There was a girl in school whose name was Kami and she was beautiful and unique. I loved the name and knew if I ever had a girl, that would be one of her names. At the time I had Kami, David was in the Marine Corp and he joked about naming her Kami Flouge Farrell (Camiflouge) There was no way I was going to let that happen. I was thinking of her middle name being Gisele but thought it sounded too close to Gazelle. Then one day I ran across the name Janelle and fell in love with it. I dropped the “e” at the end and her name became Kami Janell. Kami has never really had a nickname growing up per say but there are times when she’s called Kami Whammy or Jelly Belly. I now call her my “Queen”.

Christopher Mark – I have always considered St. Christopher as my Patron Saint because I’ve always been a traveler. So when my first son came along I decided he would be named Christopher. His middle name, Mark, was chosen for his David’s stepfather Mark. Mark was never going to have children of his own so to honor him we gave his name to Christopher, becoming Christopher Mark. Because of the way I felt about his name, I didn’t like people calling him Chris. When we was young I would correct everyone and so would he, so we avoided the nickname for a while. It was probably in middle school that people started calling him Chris. I still didn’t like it so I started calling him Topher. Some call him Chris and some call him Topher.

Cody James – By this point, I already had set in my mind that if I were to have a boy his first name would start with a “C” like Christopher and middle name would start with a “J” after Kami’s middle name. If I had a girl her first name would start with a “K” like Kami and “M” after Topher’s middle name. At the time I was pregnant with Cody, I was watching the TV show Step by Step and one of the character’s name was Cody. The character was silly, kind, and loving so I knew that was the name I wanted. Thus, when I found out I was having a boy I knew Cody would be his first name. Now for the “J”, I chose the name James for several reasons. Bonnie, my mother-in-law’s maiden was James (supposedly related to Jesse James and he’s one of my favorite outlaws), David’s brother’s name is James and at the time had only had 3 daughters so there was another reason. Another reason was because one of David’s best friend’s name is James as well.

What are you’re children’s names and how did you come up with them? What are some of the wacky names you’ve heard?